Some couples find it more difficult to consider whether to have a second child than when they decide to have their first child. This is because the presence of a second child in the home will change the family in many ways, such as social relations, lifestyle, work, finance, and of course with the first child. Science does not dictate to Mother in making decisions, especially those concerning passion and love. If the heart wants to have a second child and so on, that is desire. But Father and Mother still need good planning, such as what is the ideal distance between the first and second child and how to prepare the first child to have a younger sibling, and other preparations.
Here are some issues that Father and Mother need to consider.
When is the right time to have a second child?
According to a number of studies, the recommended waiting time for pregnant second children ranges from 18-23 months after giving birth to the first child. The distance between the first and second child is useful for preparing the body of the Mother and so that the second child can grow and develop in a healthy manner. Your body needs time to recover from postpartum stress. In addition, the body also needs to refill the nutrients lost due to giving birth to the Eldest and need to get enough vitamin intake before giving birth again. During the interval, you can use it by maintaining a healthy body, applying a balanced diet, and consulting a doctor for a pregnant program if needed.
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| Know these 3 things if you want to have a second child |
Meanwhile, if the distance between giving birth to the first child and containing a second child is less than 17 months, it can increase the risk of the second child being premature or underweight. Another study found that mothers who were pregnant within a year after giving birth to their first child would have a tendency for a second child to be diagnosed with higher autism. The second child born less than a year after the birth of the first child, has an autism risk 50 percent higher than the child born with a distance of 2-5 years from his brother.
However, the distance that is too long is also not ideal. Pregnancy after giving birth for five years, in fact, can also increase the risk of premature babies or underweight babies.
How to prepare the sister/Brother?
In welcoming the baby sister, the first child may experience various emotions. The sister can feel happy, jealous, or even hate. He may behave in an unusual manner that can drain Mother's energy, such as being fussy, having trouble eating, and behaving excessively. In addition, the first child may also show a deterioration in the ability to attract the attention of the Mother, for example forgetting the skill to use the toilet to urinate (potty training), speaking in the baby language, drinking with a pacifier, and sucking on the thumb. This problem is usually only temporary and can be solved by preparing the Eldest to be an older brother. Here are some ways.
- Tell him that there is a baby growing in the mother's stomach. Invite the sister to say "hi" or "hello" to the fetus. You can also show photos when you are a baby, then tell me that you used to be a little baby and that your baby will be like your baby when you are a baby.
- Invite the sister to accompany Mother to do a pregnancy checkup.
- Involve the first child in the frenzy of preparing the second baby, such as asking for his opinion in choosing items for the sister's room.
- Give the sister a role and tell her that it is important and very meaningful. The role that can be taken by the sister, among others, helps Mother get baby diapers, choose toys for her sister, and others.
- Give your sister a surprise gift such as a special bench for her to sit with your mother to breastfeed your baby sister. You can also prepare a small gift for your sister and give it to you when you are born. Also, say that the gift is a gift from the baby sister.
- Get close to the Eldest with people who will later help Mother take care of her when approaching the time of giving birth to a second child, such as an aunt, grandmother, relatives, or baby sitter.
- When the Eldest visits Mother after childbirth, make sure that the baby is placed in the baby cot so the Mother can hug the Eldest. This is a valuable concern for the Eldest.
What is the readiness of the Mother herself?
One of the positive changes in the pregnancy of the second child is that Mother has had the experience and knowledge of the first child, thus increasing her confidence when caring for her second child. Things that felt so heavy when taking care of the first child, including breastfeeding, changing diapers, handling disease, now seemed to be no longer too complicated.
Even though the burden of the second child may appear lighter, do not force yourself if the condition of the mother is not possible. It is better for the Mother to consult first with the obstetrician regarding the second child's pregnancy program to be more physically and psychologically prepared. Also, consider the age of the Mother. If you are under 30 years of age and you do not have health problems, then planning a pregnant program can be more flexible with your doctor. However, if Mother is 38 years old and wants two more children, Mother may not have the freedom to set the pregnancy distance of one child with another for three years or according to the ideal distance.
In addition, do not hesitate to ask for help from the closest person, both when pregnant with a second child or after giving birth. Even though Mother already has previous experience, maybe Mother still can't solve all the hassles that occur when the Sister is born.
